So I have had reason to revisit this debate with myself in the vast casm of unfilled space called my mind. I have been absent from chatting on the internet for quite a long time. Mostly, chatting to people that I know via MSN Messenger and Yahoo Messenger, but also using facebook and chat rooms. When I discuss this with people there seems quite a divide on the topic of Internet dating and most people have very stong opinions against Internet chatting and dating. I kinda find this a little odd. I settle into two areas of thought.1. With internet chatting/dating you can get to know a little about the person you are talking with before you decide to meet face to face and put your safety, potentially, on the line. usually, those interested in you for one asset show themselves very early and conversations rarely progress beyond simple sentences all aimed at getting you in a prone position of their choice. This is quite distinct from the usual "flirting" stage that all initial encounters have. On the Internet, you don't have to buy your date a drink so moving straight in for the kill is what most people (for "people" read "guys"), seem to go for like it's a winning tactic. Perhaps it is and that's why it happens so often. on the other hand, you have those that really want to chat and at least, don't mention S.E.X for a few exchanges at least. Sooner or later, it will come though and all in the comfort and safety of your own home where you can quite easily turn them off :-). And thats the key! You can turn them off. Through the haze and mist , I have chatted to some genuine and sincere people. You may eventually get to the flirting stage but they seem to have a way of telling in an online conversation, be it through type, Audio and or video, when that vital stage has been reached. Some people take their time and that is nice. Just like the real world.
2. Ok, the second way to meet people is to get off your ass and get down the pub or club and talk to "real" people. I think most people would agree this is still the primary way people hook up. But is it? Today, so many times you hear of people "meeting" through Mutual online networks (like FB), where the dynamics are more like the real world. You hang out with people you know who have freinds who eventually become your friends. You learn about peoples interests. In short, you learn a little about the person. In the real world, you have to have a reason to be there. I go out alone to the cinema and maybe a meal afterwards sometimes and I always get the "awww, Sad lonely bastard coming through" look from the others, Or perhaps it's me thinking that and manifesting it on others ;-). So if you want to go out, you have to have freinds. If you move to a new city how do you make them without going through the SLB stage? It's a dilemma so many people face and don't want to discuss it for fear of being singled out as a norma/norman nomates. face to face meetings have all the dangers associated with them and at least online, you get to know those with unwanted intentions earlier on. I'm not really into standing in a club holding a bottle of whatever just looking around while all your friends do the same. I'd rather be somewhere where you have some sort of activity like talking, dancing, eating... some sort of experience.
So, I think Internet chatting/ dating gets a bit of a bum wrap! I don't think it should replace the face to face contact we have with people, but it sure as hell can enhance it.
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